Talking Myself Down Off The Ledge

WHY do I let myself be bothered by these things???

A truly inconsequential man who relishes being obstinate and unpleasant has insinuated himself into my role on a project. Now, this would be perfectly good reason to get ticked off - IF. IF I were in the job full-time; IF I actually felt threatened that his doing so would in some way reflect on my capability or ability to keep my job; IF I actually cared about my ongoing relationship with this man (or the company, for that matter). But I don't. And so, for the life of me, I can't figure out why I let it get me all a-twitter, and why I've now got a headache from worrying about it.

The truth is, I am just irritated because it's him. If the other person who shares my role were to have said, "You know, I'm going to do this one," I would've said, "Okay." Because frankly, I'm going on vacation next week anyway and the timing of this would've worked out fine to hand it off to someone else and just be a bit player. But it's THIS guy instead, and I just loathe the way he treats everyone, the way he condescends, and the fact that I know the only reason he's assumed control (without being asked, or consulting anyone), is because he just plain doesn't like me or the other person in the job and always thinks he can do better without us (which, for the record, is absolutely not true - and I am not just tooting my own horn here; ask anyone).

And even though I spent a lot of brainpower mulling over whether or not this will signal the end of my working relationship with this company, I know that it won't - or at least that it doesn't have to. It is ONE project that he has particular interest in and therefore sees fit to insert himself in, and the reality is that he cannot do what I do, and the other person in the role needs and wants my support (at least for now ), so there is no reason to think I'm out the door. But I'm bothered because he wants to diminish my role, relegate me to something I have long since outgrown doing given my work history, education, and past role. I am merely being proud; the reality is that I should be thinking, "you want to pay me this much money to do something you could pay a $10/hour intern to do? ROCK ON!" But instead, I'm being obstinate and peevish because I am LETTING HIM GET TO ME. I hate that I am letting him get to me.

So, I am going to try very hard to take the Zen approach to my upcoming conference call. I am going to say, "whatever, dude, knock yourself out." I am going to be grateful to have it off my plate so I can rest easy on my vacation, and know that I will be billing them like an attorney (you e-mailed me? That 30-second response is a 15-minute billable increment...) for something that is completely beneath me, but hey, was their call. Wish me luck.