First Impressions

Recently, on a lark, based on general discussions about the possible necessity of my returning to the salaried working world, I updated my info on monster.com. Not 12 hours later, a consulting company sent me an e-mail expressing their interest in my resume and requesting a phone interview. Now, in spite of the fact that I really don't want to go back into consulting - which I expressly said, right there on my monster info under both "objective" and "ideal job," - I agreed to talk to them, because I don't really feel the need to burn any professional bridges when I don't know yet how desperately I may need the contact. So I e-mailed them a cheerful reply, saying that I'd be delighted to speak with them, but could we please coordinate a phone call ahead of time, as I have a 1-year old at home. I explained that nap times were the best time to talk as I could give my full attention to the phone call. The recruiter e-mailed back, asking for my preferred times; I responded with my preference, and waited for a reply with either a confirmation or a "that won't work for us; how about this time instead?". That was three business days ago.

No word for several days, and then they just call me out of the blue today at what was definitely not one of the times I preferred. Now, maybe this is a strategy to try to catch you offguard and see how you handle yourself, but I have to say, I was a little peeved. My sister was visiting, just back from her honeymoon, and although she was about to leave, I was also about to put my daughter down for a nap, for which she was way overdue, and as a result, I was expecting that the process might take awhile. So, I very politely explained to the woman that this wasn’t actually a good time for me, because I was about to put my daughter down for a nap. Would it be okay if I called her back, or she could call me back, in say, an hour? Pause. LONG pause.

Finally: “Hm. I don’t think that will work for me, because I’ll be in a meeting in an hour.”

Pause.

Okay, apparently she’s waiting for me to say something.

Me: “Well, anytime this afternoon would probably be okay; if I’m lucky, she’ll sleep until 4:30 or 5:00. Would later this afternoon work?”

Pause.

So I keep going. “I mean, really any time will work, it’s just that if she isn’t sleeping, you won’t necessarily have my undivided attention, since I have to supervise my 1-year old while I talk.”

Pause.

Again, finally, she said: “I don’t think that will work. I’m going to be in meetings all afternoon.”

Pause.

When I don’t say anything, because I’m frankly at a loss, because I'm beginning to think she doesn't understand why her meeting schedule doesn't immediately make me cave in and say "well, then now is fine," she finally said, “How about tomorrow?” Trying to be helpful, I said, “Yes, that would be fine. With some advance notice, I can plan her naps and meals accordingly. What time is good for you?”

Another pause.

Now I'm really making a face, which fortunately, she can't see. Obviously put out that she's actually had to consult her personal calendar, she finally says, “how about between 9 and 10?” Okay, clearly she isn’t at all interested in my schedule or she would have guessed that wasn’t a good time, but nonetheless, I said, “Sure, I can do that. It may be a little noisy, but I’ll be here.” No response from her other than to confirm the phone number. No rapport established, no response to my gentle joking that she may have to compete with a chatty 1-year old, nothing.

Now, here’s what I’m thinking: these people found me, I didn’t go looking for them. I very cheerfully answered their e-mail, and respectfully requested that we coordinate ahead by e-mail to set up a time to talk on the phone, because of my current situation as a stay-at-home mom. This seems fine until suddenly, they disappear for 3 or 4 days, then call me out of the blue. Already, I’m thinking that they’re either not very conscientious (because they’ve forgotten all about my request) or they’re trying to be “tricky” by catching me off-guard. Either way, I’m already not impressed. Then here I am, talking with someone, trying again to cheerfully and politely say, “This isn’t really a good time (how would this conversation have gone if I’d been at another job, I wonder?) – when else would be good for you?” and the response I get is someone who sounds totally dumbfounded that I can’t work my child-care obligations around her meetings. ? Clearly doesn’t have kids of her own! But also, doesn't seem to me like she's terribly interested in convincing me to come work there, something that should be part of her job right up until the minute they actually decide not to hire me.

My feeling is that a) they sought me out, not the other way around; b) if I go back to work, I don’t even want to do consulting – a fact I clearly stated on my monster.com info; and c) all I was asking for was a little latitude coordinating a phone call, given that I have a child to take care of – kind of like a real job, you know? So, shouldn’t they maybe be a tad more…helpful? Maybe I’ve overthinking this, but I have to say I am not left with a great impression so far. Am I wrong?